16
May
·
Wed
2007
I have a group of unique friends.. we have keep in touch through emails all the way from year 2000.. unique relationships.. some of us have known each other since 1987.. and some even since 1982.. 4 "school 1" girls and 2 "school 2" girls.. school 1 and school 2 cos in our primary school, somehow the same standard is divided in 2 groups.. hmmm, don't really know why though.. all i know was school 1 girls "do not like" school 2 girls.. childish, eh.. of cos.. we were children then.. heh..
then when we came to secondary school.. somehow all the school 1 and school 2 students were mixed and placed together..
afther that, we (me and S) went our separate ways in Form 6 / A-levels level.. i guess during that period we were no longer in touch with one another.. i dunno.. i'm sure i didn't keep in touch with any except with A.. this was the period of my life in which i find myself trying to forget.. so, my memory at times were hazy over this period.. and yet, it's the most signifant period of my life.. but i will not elaborate further, mabbe some other day.. i think we went to a Genting trip together during this period too.. for the life of me, i don't know how come I went to this trip with them..
and soon, we found ourselves joining the work force.. and one fine day, having grab hold of some of my old classmates email, which i can't remember where i got from (i hv lost track of the very first email i sent).. i just have a record of someone's reply dated some Mar-2000 that serves as a record that we started emailing in that year.. and, so, we have kept up with this form of communication - mass email
and, yesterday, due to someone's reply.. i begin to analyse myself.. cos, it's not the first time someone remind me of my too inquisite reply or too much .......... (fill in the blanks), i come to realise actually how private these friends are.. yes, we do share some details of our lives but there's still something not to say.. something like how tactful we can be.. and sometimes my intentions are/were misunderstood..
then i realise how my family function.. we never kept secrets from one another.. we tend to speak what is/are on our mind.. no trying to please someone.. no trying to be considerate.. :P.. no beating round the bush.. happy or unhappy, we can tell straight from the look of the face..
i have no conclusion.. and i know this time i have really crossed too much of the line.. what i really hope is throughout the years we hv grown, we do not have to thread gingerly around each other so as not to hurt another person.. sometimes someone feel we should not talk/say something.. but sometimes silence is hypocricy, in my opinion.. but to remain as friends, we embrace and accept each other's goodness, shortcoming, everything, we tolerate each other..
and, so, this posting is to remind me how much i treasure this special group of my friends..it last becos we made the effort.. it's special because we care.. here is to many more years of unique friendship..
(2007-05-16 11:00:31 SGT) [kindred spirit] Permalink Comments [5]
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Friendship don't come easily. Esp long friendship. I truly treasure the friendship I have with my best friend. Cross a hurdle, the relationship will deepen. All the best.
Posted by lynntan on May 16, 2007 at 05:07 PM SGT #
Waah u like v deep like that. Anyway, I feel that we should never take advantage of each other. Friendship doesnt come easy.
Posted by Marie on May 18, 2007 at 11:31 AM SGT #
Hey there. Today no mood to work.
If I'm guessing correctly what you mean, don't worry about it. You didn't cross any line, she's just very very busy these days. No time to think nor write.
I agree with you about how "better don't ask, I don't want her/him to think I so kepoh" can sometimes be counter-productive.
When it comes to close friends, I think it's better to risk your friend telling you that your question is too personal than to deprive her/him of your view of the situation.
Friends are necessary for perspective. When you're in trouble, your emotions will cloud your ability to see things clearly. That's where you need someone to tell you what they see from where they're standing. It helps you make your decisions, it gives you clearer perspective to find your way, when you're ready.
I think we've all known each other long enough to know that our friends' questions are not intended as just kepoh for the sake of kepoh.
Friendship aside though, we should all remember to observe tactfullness, be considerate of privacy and be able to not take it personally when our good intentions are rejected ;)
That's really why we've all managed to stay together all this rime, despite being such different personalities. :)
Posted by spot on May 18, 2007 at 02:54 PM SGT #
Hi! I just got back from Autumm Australia.
To concur with Spot... no I don't think that u ar too kepoh. She truly is busy these days (with all that is going on in her life).. and also, maybe, just maybe, writing is not her medium of expression as compared to Spot, and perhaps urself.
Pls feel free to ask. As we try to answer these questions, it may provide ourselves with another view/angle to the situation.
Ya ya.. we are too long gone (into the friendship) .. that I think that it is expected for us to care for one another. I have learnt that people do not do what we expect of them.. and if we cannot take it.. then.. ah well.. I am still learning this!
Different personalities... u bet we bunch are sooooo different! It's amazing we are still friends.
THanks for being a friend!
Posted by ame on May 21, 2007 at 11:59 AM SGT #
Hey Biow,
Pls dont take my actions the wrong way. Indeed all I was pointing out and asking of you, was just a little tact towards another friend who is not exactly having the best of days.
By all means, ask away if you really wish to know. It is our friend's choice whether to furnish you with the answers or not, anyway.
But tact goes a long way, more than you can ever imagine. Perhaps it is merely my personal opinion that the method used to approach a question, is important.
I apologise if I myself had been less than tactful, in the course of trying to convey the message. It had nothing to do with whether writing is my best medium of expression, but that I was being frank with my thoughts to an old friend.
indeed, we have a unique bonding, though so very different we are from each other. Here's to many more years of friendship to come.
My heartfelt apologies again, my friend.
Posted by Phoenix Heart on June 10, 2007 at 08:48 PM SGT #